Former "Dog Blamer" Comes Clean and Invites The World To Follow Suit


If you find the image above even remotely funny, then we need to have a heart to heart talk (notice how that rhymes with fart to fart? - see how the Universe is calling us to change?)

It is estimated that the dog population in the US is at 89.7 million currently. I ask you - of that number how many of Man's Best Friend are catching the blame for the noxious wind passed by the humans with whom they live? My years of research and personal experience clearly indicates that a safe estimate is 67.8% (with a 1.8% margin of error) so MILLIONS of innocent dogs are being blamed and humiliated because we as a species are afraid to own up to our fumes.


For me, this issue reared it's ugly hinney with the passing of St Otter (seen above) a few years ago. It is with a heart heavy with regret and shame that I now confess to the hundreds (maybe even into the thousands) of times Julie and I might be enjoying a movie and my cry of "Oh, Otter!!" was nothing more than my vainglorious effort to deflect attention from my own doings.

One wonders how many Thanksgivings and other family holidays have become a source of shame and degradation for dogs from Coast to Coast? Self-satisfied humans lean back in their chairs after a sumptuous meal, lean on a cheek and ease one out ONLY to blame any and all dogs in the area. Can you imagine how the joy of a dog scarfing up on all the unattended treats to be had on such occasions would plummet into the agony of humiliation when unwarranted blame is showered upon them?
NO MORE!

Working tirelessly with my legal team, I am proud to announce the kick-off of our new International Foundation: Don't Blame The Puppy (DBTP).

Will you raise your right hand and left butt cheek in joining me in a pledge to no longer pawn your cabbage laced, bean-fueled, eye watering butt breezes on canines?

You can support the effort financially, spiritually or simply by utilizing one or more of our hashtags:
#AffirmYourFarts or the shortened #AYF, #OwnYourOwn, #NoYouDidIt

Dogs have a rough enough time without having to bear the brunt of falsely laid blame.

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